The Fountain

Dedicated to J.

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Before Snake Eyes, there was A Certain Sacrifice: another movie I hated, after seeing it for the first time. I totally agreed on M, at the time: what a mistake. There was simply no quality in there. Just a bad attempt to make a movie.

But like Abel Ferrara's film, this was a case of bad timing: I wasn't mature enough to grasp the real essence of it - and what it actually represents.

A Certain Sacrifice (1979) can't be labelled simply as "a movie". Screenplay and characters are, actually, peripheral to a much higher purpose: to capture the energy, the vibe of a specific generation in a particular space and time: New York City, late 70s / early 80s.

Only now this can be recognized as such. This 60 min. film is an experience of time-travelling and no high-budget production could recreate it better. A Certain Sacrifice is genuine, raw (thank God it's low-low-budget) and in-your-face.

But more than anything, it is a document that gives us access to something so valuable. I was talking to a dear friend of mine - who's passionate about the NYC/early 80s era - about a specific scene from the movie, the other day: the scene when Bruna and Dashiel meet, at the water fountain in Washington Square Park.

This is, actually, Madonna's first recorded appearence ever, on film. We must not take "The Egg Film" or some other high-school home videos into account. We're talking about building up a career. And that's what she was doing here, 2 years after moving to New York.
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The more we talked about the fountain scene, the more I realized: what we are witnessing here is Madonna's prime, raw essence, coming to life. She's not just acting. She's performing. It's easy to imagine the director, Stephen Jon Lewicki, telling her: Just do your thing. Improvise. Action!

And there she was, unleashing this intense energy of Fire and Leo, bursting like a volcano. It's not Bruna in there. It's Madonna, the girl who was living hand to mouth but who fed herself on a dream; the girl who walked around the streets of New York and looked into people's eyes, warning them telepathically: One day, I'm gonna be famous and you will recognize me. It's Madonna, without the audience, the industry, the critics, the fans, the pressure to live up to any standards. Only the camera and her untouched essence.

We can see all this on this specific scene. It's really The Fountain of it all.

Gold and Red

On this day, 16 years ago, M performed Take a Bow with Babyface at the Shrine Auditorium, during the American Music Awards ceremony.
No dancing, no moves. Only the voice.

January 30, 1995

American Music Awards

Shrine Auditorium (Los Angeles, CA)

Take it like a man

One of my favourite Sex shots.

Dita in absolute gay porn style...

Spin SPIN, sugar!

SPIN magazine is now 25 years old and celebrated it with a readers poll.
Wise choices, SPIN readers. Wise choices...

Best Solo Artist: Madonna (#1)
Hottest Sex Goddess: Madonna (#1)
Best Song: Like a Prayer, Madonna (#2)
Best Live Act: Madonna (#3)

Click here and check all the results.
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A real actress

The last time I saw Snake Eyes (comercially released as Dangerous Game), it was still on my VHS tape. I was 17 at the time and I hated the movie.

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Actually, I wasn't ready to see it. All I wanted to see was my Idol portraying either glamour (like Breathless Mahoney), humour (like Nikki Finn) or absolute coolness (like Susan).

I totally rejected Madonna's body - the actor's instrument - involved in a context of violence, decadence, extreme submission and abuse. It hit rock bottom, during the rape scene. I simply pressed the ffw button. And I couldn't see the movie ever again.

But one thing I did retain in my mind, regarding Snake Eyes (apart from the fact that she was incredibly gorgeous in the film): her stunning performance as an actress.

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Even when Evita came in, I remember keeping this opinion. She's amazing in Evita. But she was perfect in Snake Eyes. Still, I couldn't lay my eyes on that movie again. Until a few days ago.

As an adult, I felt prepared - and curious - to get in touch with the meaning of this movie, what it really wanted to portray.

My suspicions were right: Snake Eyes is, actually, a great movie. It depicts the «battle between Heaven and Hell» in a perverse way, the same way that Lars Von Drier would later expand: grabbing you by the guts, between attraction and disgust.

The movie within a movie concept makes it all even better (or worse), leading you to greater confusion - and interest.

Then, there's Madonna. The idea I kept, for all these years, couldn't be more accurate:

it is Madonna's best performance as an actress.

Because to be a great actor, in my opinion, is to have the ability to embody a character that is truly your opposite. And take it as your own.

Among all the characters from M's curriculum, Eva Peron and Susan are usually the most acclaimed performances - by fans and by the press. But Eva and Susan were very realted to M herself. Claire (the character played by M's character, Sarah Jennings), however, was definitely not. And from the first moment we see Madonna on screen, we can feel an amazing performance coming through.

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Her performance is so intense, so real, that halfway through the movie you really forget that it's Madonna. It's really Claire. And that is amazing. She would do it again later, in Evita.

But to me, it's in Snake Eyes that Madonna achieves real acting perfection.

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Who the FUCK are these people?

Shut the FUCK up, you IDIOTS!

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Put your hands all over my body...

1980

2006

Happy Birthday!

The Birthday Present

Five years ago, on this very same day, I received one of the most unforgettable, amazing birthday presents EVER, from M herself. It was called Confessions on a Dancefloor.

On November 14th 2005, Confessions was released. The first time I listened to it was in my room, at midnight - to my surprise, it went on sale here in Lisbon during the last hours of the 13th. I bought it immediately, went home and waited for the magical hour.

I was so overwhelmed. The music was - is and will eternally be - amazing. And I was flooded with happiness.

It will always be the most special work M has ever made, in my heart.
Needless to say that I played it today.

Lightworker